Young and in the way
with a name that even
computers cannot spell correctly;
an artist addicted to the word
a freelance writer who refuses
to get a “real” job;
Socially awkward in one-on-one conversations
and worse in crowds.

Real name[s have power, stranger]: Megan Tortorella.

Hobbies [that we really don’t care about]: Writing crap and chewing bubble gum. Guess what we’re (sadly) out of?

Age [of consent does not exist in Japan]: Sixteen, going on seventeen.

Languages: English, a bit of German, a touch of Gaelic, lots of Latin.

Talents: Petting cats; occasionally mindraping inadequate therapists with depressive (and sarcastic) analogies; breathing. Often.